I’m not feeling to well these days and I’m having trouble concentrating
I’m going to see if writing helps me
My writing will probably be full of short badly written sentences but here we go.
Do you have stories that you keep in your head which may or may not contain you
I do and I don’t want to write them down I want to keep them
I have full back stories about where they went to school and family history
I took one of my characters and put him ina real memory the other day
I talk to them sometimes they help me figure things out
I remembered when my first roomate told me she didn’t want to live with me anymore
I have been upset about it for years
so I talked to my person right after it happened
I realized the reason I was so upset
we were very diferent Erin and I and I worked extreamly hard to get along with her
I didnt think it was a great situation but I thought it was ok
I remember when it happened a couple of guys at the bsu said
“its the hardest thing to go up and tell your roomate they are weird and you do not want to live with them anymore”
and I thought no the worst thing is someone saying it to you
She seemed shocked when I was shocked that she brought it up
She said you mean you want to room with me with a scowl on her face
She said that I made her feel stupid and that she wanted to live with some one from her church so they would be doing the same things together
The reason it hurt me so much was because I tried so hard to get along with her and thought I was doing a great job
Before I went to school I spent hours practicing saying her name so pronounced it right
She had looked at all my time and effort and said not good enough
The fact that I had worked so hard and it was all for nothing is what upset me
I think that when most people say they want a roomate they are actually saying they want a best friend
I can’t do that and that is another can of worms so I will conclude for now
I hope the lack of punctuation and spelling mistakes don’t bother you too much I am using my iphone
